What If You’re Not Making Progress in Therapy?
Progress in therapy can sometimes feel elusive. How do you know if it’s actually working? One clear sign is that you feel better—your symptoms improve, you experience growth, and you start seeing positive changes in the areas you set out to work on.
But what if you don’t? What if you feel stuck, like therapy just isn’t working? If this resonates with you, know that you’re not alone—and it’s not your fault. Therapy isn’t a one-size-fits-all process, and sometimes roadblocks get in the way. The key is to explore what’s holding you back so you and your therapist can adjust course together.
Possible Reasons You’re Not Making Progress in Therapy
You’re avoiding deeper issues.
You’re not applying what you learn outside of sessions.
You haven’t been in therapy long enough to see results.
You’ve made progress, but you still struggle with the same issues.
There’s a mismatch between you and your therapist.
Your therapist may lack the expertise you need.
You and your therapist have conflicting personalities.
…Or, let’s be real—your therapist just isn’t good.
Let’s break these down further.
You’re Avoiding Discussing the Deeper Issues
If your therapy sessions mostly revolve around surface-level conversations, it might be time to ask yourself “why?” Are you avoiding painful emotions? Do you find it hard to open up? Are you sticking to a "play-by-play" of your week rather than addressing the core reasons you started therapy?
While talking about daily stressors can be cathartic, real progress happens when you dig deeper. If you notice yourself holding back, consider discussing it with your therapist. They can gently challenge you and help you break through avoidance patterns.
You’re Not Applying What You’re Learning
Therapy isn’t just about talking—it’s about doing. If you’re learning coping skills for anxiety but not practicing them, change will be slow. Think of therapy like building muscle; progress requires consistency.
Try setting small, achievable goals between sessions. Journaling, mindfulness exercises, or actively using new communication strategies can reinforce what you discuss in therapy.
You Haven’t Been in Therapy Long Enough
Healing takes time. If you expected quick results, you’re not alone—but therapy isn’t a magic fix. Research suggests that meaningful progress often requires consistent, weekly therapy over several months.
There’s also a phenomenon called "flight into health"—where people feel better after a few sessions and assume they’re "cured," only to find unresolved issues resurface later. If your struggles have been present for years, true healing will take patience and commitment. The amount of time you’ll need to be in therapy can correlate with how long you’ve been dealing with a particular issues. So be patient with yourself and settle in to the process.
You’ve Made Progress, But It’s Not Perfect
Sometimes, we measure progress in absolutes: "I still have anxiety, so therapy isn’t working." But healing doesn’t mean never feeling distress again—it means learning how to cope more effectively and reducing the frequency, intensity, and duration of struggles.
Instead of expecting an overnight transformation, focus on how far you’ve come. Maybe your panic attacks aren’t gone, but they happen less often. Maybe you still feel depressed, but you can get out of bed more days than before. These are wins. Therapy isn’t about perfection—it’s about movement.
There’s a Therapist-Client Mismatch
Yes, sometimes it’s your therapist who’s the issue. And that’s okay.
A mismatch doesn’t necessarily mean they’re bad—it could just be that they lack experience in your specific concerns, or your personalities don’t align. If you feel like your therapy isn’t tailored to your needs, it might be worth discussing a new approach—or even considering a different provider.
Your Therapist May Lack the Right Expertise
Not every therapist is trained in every issue. If you’re doing trauma work but your therapist doesn’t specialize in trauma-focused approaches like EMDR or other trauma-specific therapies, you may not be getting the depth of care you need.
If you’ve been with a therapist for a while and still feel stuck, ask yourself: Do they have the right background to guide me through this? If not, seeking a specialist could be a game-changer.
Personality Clashes Can Impact Therapy
It’s okay to "fire" your therapist if the relationship just doesn’t feel right. Therapy is a deeply personal experience, and if you don’t feel safe, heard, or understood, that can hinder progress.
Most therapists won’t take it personally if you decide to move on. This is your therapy—your time, energy, and money. It’s important that you feel good about who you’re working with.
Sometimes… Your Therapist Just Isn’t Good
Let’s be real: not all therapists are great. While many are compassionate, skilled, and well-trained, some may lack insight, overstep boundaries, or simply not be effective. If your gut tells you something is off, trust it. Therapy should feel challenging but supportive, not dismissive, judgmental, or stagnant.
If you suspect you’re receiving poor therapy, consider seeking a second opinion or consultation with another provider.
Final Thoughts
If you’re feeling stuck in therapy, don’t be discouraged. Progress isn’t always linear, and setbacks are part of the healing journey. The key is to stay open, honest, and willing to explore what might be hindering your growth. If you have concerns about your progress, bring them up with your therapist—they can help you assess the situation and determine the best path forward. And if it turns out that a change is needed, that’s okay too. Your healing journey is yours, and you deserve the right support to help you move forward.
You Don’t Have to Stay Stuck—Let’s Find a Way Forward
If you’re feeling stuck in therapy or unsure if you’re making progress, you’re not alone. Therapy is a process, and sometimes, all it takes is a shift in approach, a deeper conversation, or the right therapist to help you break through. If you’re ready to explore what’s holding you back and take meaningful steps toward healing, I’d love to support you.
Reach out today to schedule a consultation and let’s work together to help you move forward.
